Maybe It Isn’t Self-Sabotage: What the Inner Critic is Really Trying to Do

We’ve all heard the voice.
The one that says you’re not ready.
That you’re not enough.
That you should have done it differently.

For many of us, that inner critic feels like the enemy. But what if it isn’t? What if that critical voice is actually trying to protect you—just in a way that feels harsh, outdated, or unhelpful?

In this episode of It Doesn’t Have to Be This Way, Laura Rees and I explore the deeper story of the inner critic through the lens of Internal Family Systems (IFS). Instead of labeling these parts as “bad” or “sabotaging,” we ask: what role are they trying to play in our lives?

✨ You’ll hear us unpack:

• Why the inner critic shows up most when we’re stretching or risking something new
• How IFS helps us see these voices as parts of us—not the whole of us
• The surprising ways that criticism can mask care, fear, or a longing for safety
• Why befriending the critic might be the most compassionate act of all

When we stop waging war against our inner critic, we open the door to healing, clarity, and self-trust.

This episode is an invitation to get curious about the voices inside you—especially the ones you’ve tried to silence. Because maybe they’re not here to tear you down. Maybe they’re here to keep you safe until you show them a gentler way forward.

If you’ve ever felt like you’re at war with yourself—or wondered why you “sabotage” the very things you want—this conversation is for you.

🎧 Listen to the full episode: Maybe It Isn’t Self-Sabotage: What the Inner Critic is Really Trying to Do