Keeping Your Heart 

Why is it important to Keep Our Hearts Engaged?

Once we’ve decided to truly engage, sometimes we become weary or fearful and we pull away or allow our hearts to become calloused. In this section, we look at ways to engage in life-giving and supportive experiences that allow us to maintain a compassionate mindset.

@renaemdupuis
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I had a really great conversation with someone today about what type of coaching I offer, and this came to the forefront for me... I'm here to hold a safe, compassionate, and open space with people who are wondering how to move past whatever is holding them back from bringing their whole selves into their spaces and places. Are you ready to invest in yourself and declare that you are worthy of the time and attention it takes to release false narratives and constraints? If you are ready to invest in yourself, I will invest in you, too! For the next 15 people who join The Pause Membership, I will offer a Founding Member price that will save you over 40% each month ($27 instead of $47). Join us in The Pause to take the restorative break you need and find your next step away from burnout. You ARE worth it! https://renaemdupuis.com/founding-member-the-pause #youareworthit #thepause #sustainablechange

I had a really great conversation with someone today about what type of coaching I...

An inconvenient truth: Shortcuts don't build sustainability. When we are ready to grow, change, heal, or develop, even small, mindful moments can lead to profound and lasting shifts in our lives. Micro-journeys of mindfulness invite us into a sustainable practice that begins with weaving little moments into your everyday life. It could be stopping to take a deep breath before responding to an email. Or pausing to reflect on something that brought you a sense of gratitude in the day. Curated views of transformation from social media and movies would have us believe transformation is immediate and dramatic, but we know that it isn’t the foundation of what is sustainable and healthy. What one small step can you take to increase your capacity so you can be present and connected? To support you in your journey, I’ve created a brief guide, “Affirmations for Daily Living,” available for you to download and use as you make those meaningful and manageable movements toward the truth of you. https://renaemdupuis.com/affirmations-for-daily-living-sign-up/ You are worth it, Amazing Human!

An inconvenient truth: Shortcuts don't build sustainability. When we are ready to grow, change, heal,...

Even though you may have heard differently from other people or voices today (or this week, this month, this lifetime) - I want to affirm that you are worthy of the good stuff. Have you made mistakes? Yup. Will you make more? Yup. Have you hurt people? Yup. Will you do it again? Likely. Do you wish you could go back and make different choices? I'm going to guess the answer is 'yes.' And even if you answered affirmative to all of these questions, that's not the full story of you. We can repair. We can heal. We can restore. We can transform. But we can't do those things until we hold hope that we are worthy of love and that it is okay for us to experience the good stuff. So, as you are making things right with others, yourself, and the world, here is something for you to repeat to yourself until you believe it is true for you and everyone else. #thetruthofyou

Even though you may have heard differently from other people or voices today (or this...

I have a radical suggestion for today - how about a Peaceful Protest? Hello, dear one. I'm going to take a guess that you might have been on your devices more than usual the last 7 days. Maybe today, we can take a break for at least a space of time, unplug, and connect to the natural world? Some light, some fresh air, a reminder of beauty and nature that existed before news cycles, pundits, social media, and electronic messages. What would it be like if you were able to listen for the sound of the world and let the beating of your heart become louder than any fear, worry, frustration, anger, or discontent, even if just for a few minutes? Come back to your center, friend, to a time before the clamoring of voices grew louder than your own internal wisdom. Hold your protest against the messages that would tell you that you are broken, twisted, lacking, and less than. Breathe in deeply, expanding your heart and breaking the tightness of the bands of limitations formed by the bombardment of lies that keep you from loving and connecting to the truth of you. For you are worth it!

I have a radical suggestion for today - how about a Peaceful Protest? Hello, dear...

Maybe we should pay attention to the small stuff. While pulling back to see the big picture and keeping in mind that our lives are interconnected systems that experience change all of the time, I think it's important to remember that sustainable healing, growth, and restoration are all incremental. Big, sweeping changes might look like progress from one point of view, because there is an out come to point to. What physical science has taught us well, however, is that when systems are impacted by a big adjustment, the system will fight back to return to stasis. Equal and opposite reaction. If we want to make lasting change, we need to do so by honoring the need for incremental changes until the system can withstand the stress of new and begin to build capacity and resilience to take on the next challenge. Drops of water, slowly collecting, traveling together, continuing on a path, can change the face of the world. But it starts with one. What one small step can you take to increase your capacity so you can be present and connected? We need you, amazing human... You matter. Your story matters. Your journey matters. Let's create sustainable peace together, one drop at a time. #thetruthofyou #themoment #thepause #sustainablechange

Maybe we should pay attention to the small stuff. While pulling back to see the...

Dear one - you are worthy of the action of rest. You are not your production. You are not your job. You are not valuable because of what you do, but simply because of who you are. Engage in a peaceful protest against the tyranny of the urgent and the expectations that would diminish your humanity - connect with your full self, identify your needs, and meet them in sustainable ways. The return on investment beats the market every single time! ___________ You can download a free Mindfulness workbook and journal on my site if that is a helpful tool for you - https://renaemdupuis.com/mindfulness-for-busy-days-download/ #youareworthit #thepause #themoment #thetruthofyou

Dear one - you are worthy of the action of rest. You are not your...

You don't have to justify your feelings. You don't owe anyone an explanation. For years, humans have been taught that we are thinking beings who sometimes feel, but we now know the opposite is true. Your feelings are how your brain and body are actively interpreting the meaning of what it is currently experiencing in an effort to keep you safe. Don't drown them out or silence them. Honor them. Be curious about them. And then, when you are ready, choose how you want to respond. If you need some help with this today, I've got a brief Mindfulness download that I'm sharing freely with whoever wants it - https://renaemdupuis.com/mindfulness-for-busy-days-download/ You are worth it, precious human! #mindfulness

You don't have to justify your feelings. You don't owe anyone an explanation. For years,...

Hey friends - I'm thinking this might be a helpful tool for today - please receive it with my hope that it will give you the space you would like for this season! https://renaemdupuis.com/mindfulness-for-busy-days-download/

Hey friends - I'm thinking this might be a helpful tool for today - please...

Today may be filled with many, many voices and images, especially if you are in a region of the world that is participating in a national election. When our brains and bodies receive more input than we have the capacity to process at any given moment, our amazing nervous system protects us by shutting down some of our receptors. This helps us focus on getting to safety so we don't get hurt in the melee felt by our senses, which is super helpful when a tiger or a bear is chasing you! ---and--- maybe not so much when the threat is less immediate - it can limit access to problem-solving in those situations where we will have time to respond instead of react. Perhaps we don't need to attack when someone says something thoughtless. Maybe, if we feel the urge to verbally eviscerate someone who has been offensive, we can be curious about why our brains are treating them like a tiger at that moment. Taking a moment and pausing the interaction gives us the margin to activate our boundary-setting skills and insert the distance needed to regulate our stress response. This doesn't mean we don't honor our feelings and emotions - we NEED to have those because that's at the core of our humanity! [note: your brain and body are finely tuned to protect you, and whatever is perceived as a threat *IS* a threat until it isn't - let's not punish, stigmatize, or shame our survival functions] It means that we develop strategies to make sure that our nervous system doesn't override all of our other systems in situations where we need to access our prefrontal cortex. One of my favorites is to do a Body Scan - noticing where my body is in time and space and how it is feeling from my head to my toes. Coming back into my body allows me to become aware of how my sympathetic nervous system is engaged and to activate my parasympathetic nervous system. Here's a checklist if you are overwhelmed today: 1. Thank your body + brain for doing its job 2. Bring awareness to where your body is making contact with the earth (chair, floor, etc) 3. Identify if the threat is immediate (lion, tiger, or bear, etc) 4. Create space (mental, physical, etc) 5. Repeat as necessary #youareworthit

Today may be filled with many, many voices and images, especially if you are in...

This week is already a thing, huh? Yeah, there's a lot going on right now, and the stress levels feel like they are rising a bit, at least from my view over here! If you could add or subtract one thing to give yourself a little more margin in the morning - so you can stay connected to yourself and others - what would it be? 90 seconds of breath? Writing down 3 points of gratitude? Identifying a success from yesterday? Looking into the sky and finding something beautiful? Waiting 10 minutes to open your emails? It doesn't have to be a big thing (in fact, big changes cause us to cling to the past) - just one thing you might try. I invite you to allow yourself the space this week to add a little more margin, a little space, a little grace to your morning routine. Let that little bit of extra capacity hold the truth that you are worthy of the good stuff and that this season is just for now, not forever. #youareworthit #JustForNowNotForever

This week is already a thing, huh? Yeah, there's a lot going on right now,...

Is it too complicated? Sometimes it feels that way. But it doesn't have to - and I'm here to help! If you want to join me for a free wellness session where we try new mindfulness practices please sign up for your spot and to meet life on Wed, Nov 6 at 10am PST - https://renaemdupuis.com/self-care-live/ #youareworthit #thepause #themoment

Is it too complicated? Sometimes it feels that way. But it doesn't have to -...

I love this photo....and it hurts really bad at the same time. Why? In the background you see my favorite place in the whole world - my Sanctuary. I built my outdoor office/she-shed/Sanctuary three years ago with the help of many amazing people. It was a labor of love that lasted 30 days and brought a sense of accomplishment and joy to all who were involved. It was the first time I had a space that was truly mine, that didn't need to be shared or used by anyone else. It was where I could create, cry, contemplate, and just be myself. Truly, my favorite place anywhere. Because of the circumstances surrounding my family (and an unreasonable landowner), I was not able to bring my Sanctuary with me when we left our home of 9 years. Every day, I miss it. I don't foresee a time when I will be able to recreate it, and the loss is not just the space but also a significant financial investment that I have had to release. Some people I shared my grief with were quick to encourage me that it was just a thing, or that I'll rebuild, or that at least we are safe. Friends, those are not helpful things to share with someone who is expressing grief and loss. Instead of being kind, it can feel very dismissive or diminishing. At worst, it can make someone feel like they are unknown and their experiences aren't valid. As we head into the holiday season, I hope that you can celebrate; I hope you experience joy, connection, and wonderful memories that can carry you through the hard times that inevitably come. ---and--- I hope that if you are in a season of loss you have people who will hold the line for you and allow space to process in safety and compassion. Because we humans (broadstroke statement here), especially in Western culture, are pretty terrible at bereavement and pain-avoidant, we might default to rushing others through their process due to our own unresolved losses or discomfort. You, dear one, are worthy of the grace and space. This is #thetruthofyou _____________________________ If you want support in creating safe containers for grief processing, please send me a message—you are not alone! #youareworthit

I love this photo....and it hurts really bad at the same time. Why? In the...

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I so enjoyed presenting on Compassion Fatigue today - This week is going to be fun!

I so enjoyed presenting on Compassion Fatigue today - This week is going to be...

I think this is a SoCal version of a "snow day" - we can all take the day off, right? (Also, I am originally from Montana, so I know what it is to dig out a 5 ft snow bank at your front door - calm down Northern friends) I am grateful for warmth and shelter today.

I think this is a SoCal version of a "snow day" - we can all...

This is the face of a person who was so ready to do the thing today, but whose body betrayed her. I am reflecting on the fact that 20 (heck, maybe even 10) years ago, I would have just pushed through the pain and made it happen. It's not that I am less strong today, it's that I am much stronger. I am strong enough in my sense of what my heart, mind, body, and soul need. When my body gives me a FULL STOP, I need to listen. That takes courage. My default programming is "make it happen" and "don't wuss out" - and that's what I am doing. If I choose longevity and health over the short-term win of completing the task that would cost me in recovery time, peace of mind, and connection to my body, that *is* making it happen. I am making me happen and not choosing the short-term win over the long-term success. Take care of yourself, everyone. Listen to your body. Access your internal wisdom.

This is the face of a person who was so ready to do the thing...

Soundtrack: Boots and cats and boots and cats and boots and cats.

Soundtrack: Boots and cats and boots and cats and boots and cats.

I just saw this on one of my groups and I immediately knew that some of us needed to take a moment to grace ourselves in this start to 2024. Take a breath, friends!

I just saw this on one of my groups and I immediately knew that some...

While I know this isn't cold for many of you in other spaces and places, coming into my office today and realizing it was going to be a chilly time was a shock to my system! A little surprise or shock is a good thing when you are in a growth season. But not so much when you are in a survival phase. I am grateful that today I am in the former and that this wasn't another barrier to felt safety. AND.... It prompts me to hold compassion for the millions of people around me that are seeking safety in their spaces and places. Be gentle and kind to those around you. Be gentle and kind to yourself. Be gentle and kind. #CompassionateMindset #feltsafety #traumahealing

While I know this isn't cold for many of you in other spaces and places,...
This is my filter for EVERYTHING today....

This is my filter for EVERYTHING today....

Having a fabulous birthday lunch with Casey K. Clark ! So grateful for the people who sponsored this lovely day so we can just BE and breathe in a place of Joy! Thank you! #notfifty #DecemberBirthday #JoyJoyJoy

Having a fabulous birthday lunch with Casey K. Clark ! So grateful for the people...

Here's my question. As a ND person myself (late diagnosis ADHD) seeing that Soooooooo many of my peers are finding the same is true for them, at what point do we get to say that the baseline for typical has moved and, therefore, the expectations in all environments needs to as well? I don't need "accommodations" - I need people to understand that spaces and places must increase their capacity for diverse brain adaptations and realize that some standards are based on fear of the "other."

Here's my question. As a ND person myself (late diagnosis ADHD) seeing that Soooooooo many...

Um, I owe you an apology, I think... November 9-11, something cool is happening and I think I didn't tell you! The Becoming TraumaWise Summit is a free online event for people who actually give a care and want to keep caring - if this is you (and I think it is) please head to www.traumawise.com/summit to get your free ticket! #becomingtraumawisesummit #traumawise #traumainformed #compassionfatigue #caregiverburnout #freesummit

Um, I owe you an apology, I think... November 9-11, something cool is happening and...

How do I do it all? Well, I don't. I don't do 50% of what I want to do on any given day. I am coming to terms with that. But one thing I do every day is to spend about an hour writing, reflecting, caring for myself, and praying. It is a lot of time. I could do a lot of other things with that hour. That time, however, is my protest against busyness in my business. I want to live with intention. I want to be aligned with my purpose. I want to learn, grow, heal, and engage. Which means this is one of over a dozen pages of journalling and reflection I complete every day. It doesn't mean it will work for you. But you do need practices that will work for you so you can sustain. If you want some ideas, let me know and I'll send you the link for a little thing I am doing next month (don't worry, it is free) to help you build that out in your life. You are an awesome you and the world needs your awesomeness.

How do I do it all? Well, I don't. I don't do 50% of what...

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